gimme another 3 days :) will be back here again...
will be sharing on a book title "Life on the edge"
Some thoughts on this book...
This book aim to reach out to youths lyk me...
who are still slowly shaping into something...
but seems that the society has stained most of us...
and the wrong seems right... and the right seems wrong...
this book teaches and shares about different challenges a youth can expect
in the coming years...
If u're interested... come and pop by this sun :)
will be just covering chap by chap (just some insights i have)

Anw... just gt back from camp and chalet
Gt to clear up my many thoughts in this few days...
so now i'm fresh again! :D
Lvling up slowly....
And soon... i'll have a room of my own
time to be artistic xD

Finally semester 2 is OVER!
It's time for a break...
but seems to be a tiring one for now...
often find myself not please...
nth pleases me... sastify me...
seems that i'm just a super obsessed bull that keeps ramming into walls...
turning back to the starting line and that fact never changes...
For the past 30 mins... i've been struggling to find something to do online...
chat wif someone online? watch some shows online? maybe manga will be gd hmm... facebook?
check my profile(hope something pops up?)
but ended up, i went to hop blogs :)
This past few days, i've been trying hard to learn how to play guitar... but until day 9
that passion suddenly died... but i've learn a bit.... but i know i need to push myself...
wanted to improve my languages... but still didnt had to courage to start...
Found an interesting book from the library about how to oriented oneself....my purpose for studying...that aim... borrowed but seems to have collected dust halfway through...
BB commitments... still unsettled... still uncertain.
church fellowship.... feeling a bit far away... but i'll con't to try...
studies... been a drag... but i pray that somehow God will show me the way...
Family... mom's going for eye checkup today... i pray i pray that nth serious will happen.
Dad on mission trip in thailand... pray for his journey mercy
my little bro... pray that he can more motivated in his studies... so that he won't be lyk me...
little coco... pray that she will not find us too cold to her as we dun have enough time to
keep her company...
everyone has been quite moody for some reasons... pray that God will keep us calm and
and give us the peace we needed most...
pray that i won't be too self-orientated and start caring the one around him...
Nyp campus crusade... found a v heart warming group of christians that are unknowningly so close to me but yet... i still have a doubtful heart...
Pray that i know and learn what God wants me to do soon... I'm really drain...
but often i question myself... am i closing myself away from him? am i just not gd enough?
Sometime ago... when i heard from someone prasing me that i've grown spiritually well... i disgust as i recall... in my mind it goes... are u sure? Sometimes the thought just switches on and off.
My life has been revolving round many things... many things... so much that I dunno what am i revolving at.
I've realise that praying alone won't just do it... preparation for it is also a must do...
The same logic as pooing and eating...( think this is a bad example though..) dun eat... can't poo = not healthy... dun poo... can't eat... = v bad for health.
So likewise... prayer and preparation comes together...

when i was in the library the other day.... i gt this book( which is the one that is collecting dust at home...) said this important phrase that stuck me
" What makes this period ( young adulthood life 16 - 26 ) even more significant is the impact of early mistakes and erros in judgment. They can undermine all that is to follow. A bricklayer knows he must be very carful to get his foundation absolutely straight, any wobble in the bricks at the bottom will create an even greater tilt as the wall goes up. So it is in life."
At that point i finally re-called the non-stop nagging from my parents when i was young...
boy... work hard ... and you will be rewarded greatly...
Likewise in God's kingdom...
yeah work hard.... but work smart...
Often found myself saying yes to everything ppl ask me...
Often found myself having too much friends...( gd or bad idk)
Often found myself tired and alone at the end of the day...
Often foundd myself being less active then others... but at least they know when to rest...
Often found myself having different friends to hang out wif almost every week...
But i know... thr is one friend that never changes... God himself... but still =.= i'm still far away...
If only i can be that somebody that can do things up swiftly and accurate...
Someone that has that NERVE.... to be decisive... and not waver... not too lax... but comfortable...
someone that is dependable on....
If only i can do this stuff... i would definately be... a christ orientated person...
Maybe from this blog on... i will set targets for myself :) as a kind of contract for myself xD

Anw... i'm v comforted to see everyone else doing quite well :) especially my church batch peeps :)
no matter wad dun give up! :)
Fellowship peeps :) Thanks for having me
Crusade... Thanks for ur patience...
Family... Thanks for the support u've give me...
BB... Thanks for everything =.=
Friends... I dunno...

Night guys... sry for e messy post again..

yeos. long time since i've typed in this white box...

Currently... i'm quite stable in my juggling of stuff :)

especially when i'm having holiday now!

more time to think about stuff

The previous posts that i uploaded were all small complains...

badmouthing my course...

After this many months of struggle..

i seem to withdraw from the rejection i once had for that course...

Previously i was just so certain so head on in having the course changed...

I tot that i was just a screwed up poly student

My mindset keeps changing... which i realise was my weakness

From sec 4... from choosing pharmacy... to food science... to architecture and to... food science again... and again...

This just showed me how indecisive i am...

I'm utterly ashame of myself.. really...

But... i realise something... that this is He's plan for me...

Whenever i look back at myself... i smile... but when i look at wad's in front of me i shrink away...

this shouldnt be...

haiz.. touch 2 weeks i had since the letter of rejection came into my life =.=

i wasnt really stress on being rejected... it's the decision i have to made next...

(the what's next thingy)

cuz there's 2 option for me... stay on as a food scientist OR appeal to MP

Previously... my stand was... if letter come and it rejects me to change course then i will stay on in my current studies....

but mom say that... should con't to press on to break the door in, find other solutions... the MP thingy is she suggest one also... at first i was quite ok with it, but somehow it just rejects me...

and today's the the i meet the person... i dunno if i should or not... so i still have 18 hrs to think about and pray...

After this few months of falling and climbing...falling and climbing back... it isnt a waste... in my view... cuz i've gain something more valuable... once i know my goal... i'll cling on it for life! hope my vision comes real soon :D wait and pray and i'll make preparation too in the mean time.

Currently this is my core prob... hope once this settle i will be a freeeeeeeeee man :)

to be con't~